On another land

To borrow from Julie Delpy, when you are younger you think that you are going to find many people who you connect with, and over a period of time you then realize that there in fact are very few people that you connect with. Its true, you meet so many people all through your life and its only a few who you can connect with, with whom you can be yourself without any worries and very few who can really relate to and tolerate on a daily basis. And when you do have those rare encounters where you find a person you connect with instantly, a person you have so much to talk to, with who you can be yourself and with who you have a lot of fun, who you think really makes sense, when you do have those chance encounters they are moments of pure bliss. During the times you get lost in the company, oblivious to the people and surroundings and really discover a new self in you. It is also interesting to note that such encounters usually happen when you are in a new place, a place where you have no usual routine, nowhere to get to, no one to go meet, a place where you are just there. Just there with the person and you discover the joy of discovering a new place and a new person. And those feelings, that connect, that joy is precious. They always remain with you, irrespective of whether you are in touch with the person, or whether you feel the same towards the person or even if your equations are still the same. The memories you cherish nevertheless. You look back, and you feel that its sad that you don't have the same equation with the person, but you don't cry over it, because maybe you have gained more than lost in the process.
I think the reason that this may fade is because you don't take the effort. The first time around when you have that spark you bank on it and everything rides on it, and then you get back to your routine and you think that the spark will remain, which of course it may but with some effort. We always forget that part of it, the effort. Not everything comes easily. It may come easily the first time around, but following that, things need some effort. Even friendships require some amount of effort.
I think what makes you most queasy is the thought that it may have not been for the other person all that it was for you. Even if it is downplayed one percent in his mind, for you its a total disaster. And that uneasy feeling always remains, what if it didn't mean to him all that it meant to you, and I'm not even talking about getting into a relationship with the guy.  What I'm talking about is the connection, that joy, those moments, that may translate into a life-long friendship even. Its sad when people don't take the effort to maintain relationships, to work on something that may have blossomed into something beautiful. To leave it mid-way can mean two things, one - that you think its not worth the effort, two - that you want to leave things the way they were. Of course the optimistic would prefer the latter over the former, but would that mean having a romantic ideal?